A few open letters

Dear Mr. President,

I'm sure everyone in the south is thankful that you came down and did a photo op. Was the turkey real this time, or just as plastic as the one in Iraq you gave troops? Thank you for not blaming this one on Clinton, and instead rolled out the excuse that no one there had ask for federal help yet. I guess that 'state of emergency and request for aid' back on August 25th has been expunged from the official record. And it's a good thing you don't read the paper or you'd see that the man in charge of the Federal Emergency Managment Agency told people that no one in your administration knew about the 20,000 people in the Superdome until Thursday, and there were all getting two meals a day anyway.

So thanks for showing everyone what I've been saying about you all along. You live on the Bizarro world where the President's desk has a sign that read 'The Buck Stops Anywhere Else.' Then again, a man who said two years ago that the mission was accomplished in Iraq, and didn't even know he had invested in a tree growing company and thinks that we were all made out of mud in an afternoon shouldn't be counted on for having a command of the facts.

Love, Cory

Dear Ms. Rice,

Did you enjoy your vacation in New York? I'm sorry those annoying poor people ruined the last few days of your vacation by dying and such, but at least you got to over-rule your arrogant boss when he said that the US would not accept any foreign aid. Maybe someone let you know that since the people affected by the floods weren't getting any American aid, some foreign aid might be a good idea. Hope you like your new shoes as much as the people of New Orleans like their new graves.

Love, Cory

Dear Mr. Cheney,

Please write. No one has seen you since the disaster, and we're worried about you.

Love, Cory

Dear Mr. Brown,

We've decided we're going to put together a collection to buy you a TV set, so that you can see what the bloody blue bumblefuck is going on in the world, since you didn't know about the people in the Superdome until Thursday, and you corrected all of those silly people there, reminding them that they were getting two meals a day and plenty fo water, until what the silly facts told them.

Love, Cory

Dear Press Corps,

Nice to see you again. I haven't heard from you since the fall of 2000? Where have you been? Did you bring me any souveneers from your extended trip? Are you going to stay around, or is there a pretty blonde girl missing somewhere you need to talk about?

Love Cory"